During the weekly spinning class at my local health club in Oakdale, Minnesota, our 40-something spin instructor informed us that at our upcoming session, she would be playing a selection of music from the 1960's, 1970's and 1980's. A few of the younger class members screwed up their faces in disapproval at this appalling news and complained loudly at being forced to listen to these ancient madrigals. The instructor, in response to this Millennial angst, explained that by playing music from an earlier era, she wouldn't have to take the time to go through and bleep out offensive song lyrics, as she would when playing some contemporary songs. I nodded my head in sage agreement at this observation and not just because I love classic rock.
Now lest you think that I am a prudish school marm or one of those people who reflexively decry the manners of the younger generation, let me explain. For three year I was a merchant sailor in the British Merchant Navy. While working as an 18 year old lad in the galley of my first ship, the Northern Star, I was interested to hear the "F" word used with as much creativity as one would normally apply to great works of literature. I heard it used as a noun, an adjective a verb, as punctuation, and on occasion, and to great effect, as a hyphen. In that environment and during that period, the mid 70's we mostly kept the more liberal use of these words confined to the ship. (In English speaking countries anyway) Using that kind of language ashore, could, and did get people arrested - or at least thrown out of the pub.
Several years later, as a police officer in London, I not only heard plenty of bad language, I was also obliged to make sure that I could recall and spell it correctly in my arrest reports. Being able to repeat naughty words articulated by the accused at the time of arrest; either to the magistrate or to an attentive jury was also a prerequisite for the job. Stints in the army reserve and at an oil refinery have also exposed me to the deliciously profane and the delightfully coarse among my fellow man. So suffice to say, I am very familiar with the Anglo-Saxon vernacular of my forebears.
Why then, you ask, am I appalled by this fashion of larding modern songs with the crudest sexual, racial and misogynist language? After all, wasn't Rock n' Roll founded on the ability to shock? Weren't those earlier songs filled with sexual, racial and drug-related euphemisms, including the term Rock n' Roll itself ? Well yes, and I know that our elders were suitably outraged at the time, and provided us with the usual grim predication's of the imminent "End Times" However, at least in those days we had to search for the naughty meaning in lyrics and to explicate the sly double entendre. We could argue over the real meaning of Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds or Got to Get You Into my Life by the Beatles, however once we knew they were songs about drugs (or not) it was kind of a let down. Hearing Prince sing Sexy Motherf%#@*& on my daughters car CD player, not only profoundly shocked me, it took any mystery out the song. A current tune by Pink is called F***in' Perfect, which is in itself a pleasant enough tune, but the title refrain makes it unlistenable in public. Doesn't allegory or metaphor make art (including music) better at some level?
You just don't like our modern music because you don't understand it old man, I can hear my younger readers sneer in derision. Au contraire my Generation Y friends. I share an appreciation of many 21st Century bands with my contemporary carbon-based life forms. Arcade Fire spring to mind, or Amy Winehouse, the White Stripes, the Avett Brothers, even Katy Perry - I have downloaded them all. So listen, I'm hip, I'm cool. I just don't enjoy living at the intersection of bad language and good music. The odd swear word for effect I can handle. Lou Reed and Pink Floyd were (rightly) bleeped in their day for fairly mild language (by current standards), however listening to talented young singers talk like dock workers, somehow detracts from both a nice melody and the sanctity of the dock worker.
So to aspiring songwriters let me be clear. Bad language doesn't shock me, it just makes me and others (even younger others) cringe. I understand that I am not your audience and probably don't download your tunes. However I can suggest some great metaphors and similes for you, some which even rhyme! Let later generations take college courses trying to understand your lyrics - and let me spin to something good, modern - and clean!
Until next time - The Albion Bulldog.
